To the mother of my beloved (a cheesy poem)

the other day i saw my dear friend's mom from a distance. then this poem sparked to my head.

mother of my beloved
by: geronimo martinez

mother of my beloved, will you believe my next words?
do you find me trustworthy enough, and sincere as well?
indeed you have known me from my childhood until now
just as you raised and watched over my beloved.

mother of my dearest, please regard me with pity
i seek your understanding, and perhaps forgiveness
there is none i would dare assume would accept
what i tell you now, only you can heed

mother of my friend, please calm yourself now
do not fear my presumptuousness nor my seriousness
indeed it is i who should fear the most
for now i shall tell you, how I love your child so

mother of my lover, i beg your understanding
for only a mother's love can hope to comprehend
what my heart for so long has tried to show
that it shouts your son's name every day that i live

mother of my beloved, i implore you to anger not
i commit no injustice to your child nor to society
there is no perverse nor unclean intention to my will
i swear upon my life, it is the purest love i've given

why then, mother of my dearest, do i trouble you now?
why do i burden you with the truth i've tried to hide?
it is because of my fear that your son might sever ties
if he learns of my love, love that the world sees not

only your mother's love can see within me
that crying little boy who knew no true comaradary
to that lonely young man who's heart grew to love
that pure friendship your son willingly gave.

do you see now, mother of my friend?
this love for your child spurned new life for me
i've become a better man because of him
and that is why i can never love him enough

truly it is my greatest fear in life
that your son would shun me for my preference
that he would turn a cold shoulder to my pleas
that even our friendship would be left a memory

this is why i trouble you with my words, mother of my beloved
i cannot hope for him to understand what i feel
so i entrust to you this knowledge, that you may realize
how great my love is for your only son

had i not told you this, my secret will consume me
none has known of this, save for you
worry not, mother of my beloved, i will trouble you no further
tell him one day, that i loved him more than he could ever know.

I need to justify my laziness....to myself.

walang mamamagitan sa akin at ang aking oras para sa aking

pansariling kagustuhan. oo nga't hindi ito gawain ng pulidong

mag-aaral, ngunit ito ang aking prinspiyo sa pagtatrabaho.

kailanma'y hindi ako magiging alipin ng aking trabaho.



tawagin mo akong tamad, oo. walang pagsisikap, sige rin. alam

kong mayroong mga magagaling na tao, na payag masakrepisyo ang

kanilang mga sarili sa ngalan ng kanilang tungkulin, at dahil

doon sila'y dakila. kinikilala ko sila. ngunit kailanma'y

hindi ako matutulad sa kanila.



maaari nga't pagmamatigas lang ito ng aking pagmamalaki sa

sarili; isang nakasisirang paraan ng pagmamayabang... ngunit, sa

alam ko'y maganda pa rin ang pamumuhay ko ngayon sa kabila ng

aking pagbibigay ng higit na pansin sa aking pansariling oras.

at ako'y kuntento pa rin.



kung tutuusin, kung hindi ko ginagawa ang ganito, marahil

napaka-iba ng aking katauhan sa iyong nakikita ngayon.

ihalintulad mo na lang ang aking prinsipyo sa isang magiting

na sundalo. oo nga't siyay magaling. lahat ng oras niya'y

iginugugol sa pakikidigma at pakikipaglaban. at siya nga'y

nananalo sa napakaraming guerra. ngunit para saan ang lahat ng

ito kung sa kanyang pag-alay ng sarili sa pakikidigma ay

nalimutan na niya ang kanyang tunay na ipinaglalaban? paano pa

kaya kung ang sundalong ito'y nagpahirap ng mga inosenteng

kababayan ng kaaway, para lang sila'y takutin...? ganoon ang

aking paniniwala.



kailanma'y, huwag mong kalimutan ang iyong sarili.








i try to keep telling myself this whenever i feel insecure at the vastly superior efforts everyone else puts in their studies. for as long as i can keep lying to myself...i can be sure i've done no wrong to my pride...

isang tula para sa teacher. may kilala ba kayong teacher na pwede pagbigyan nito?

SLEEPY
by: geronimo martinez

that simple and sure lack of interest
a time when there is no want for meaning
when this void befalls the weary
be about your wits!

as the devil silently slithers
with his person the shadow's will
cloaking your senses in darkness
and making time itself stand still!

try as I might, there is no defense
even as i invoke fire upon my lips
no burning passion can resist
this dreaded weakness of the flesh

stand tall and firm, persevere!
yet these words fall short and hollow
pace around, free your mind!
yet you are caged within delirium


mindful of every sound, every tick
every whisper and murmur or smirk
with eyes all around to see your fall
what can a man do but damn it all!

as my deadened words grind to a halt
i sought the respite of my seat
without intention my head wanders the unknown
with nothing but an audible bang

as though the pain was insufficient
the laughter would wake even death
i shall not hang my head in shame
lest i fall back into abyss

of the many eyes that criticized
one of them approached to speak
in a kindly voice that sought to implore
"my dear professor, you should sleep more!"